Post by: Lee Phelan
When I was in high school I loved art, and my day was packed full of art classes. There was one particular project that I was extremely excited about. We were asked to construct a box out of whatever materials we wanted, the inside was supposed to represent our inner selves, while the outside was what we portrayed to the world. I was so excited about it that I took my project home and stayed up all night working on it, ignoring the other homework I had been assigned that day. By five in the morning the box was done and I was thrilled, however, the art teacher was not.
He explained to me that this project wasn't going to be due until the end of the month, giving us three weeks or so to work on it. To my dismay he pointed out how hastily my box had been constructed: there were uneven edges, blobs of glue showing, and the drawings were sloppy. Most importantly, he noted that I simply did not take the time for my ideas to solidify. My box met all the requirements for the assignment and it was “done,” but it was not the finished and thoughtful piece he was looking for.
Testing in the martial arts is like my art box. It is easy to get in a hurry, to check off the requirements in the book, to expect your next belt, and to inevitably feel crushing disappointment when told that you are not ready. Despite all the years of your training, despite doing Seisan kata or Aiki-Otoshi five million times, you may not be ready. It isn't that you are doing the techniques wrong, or that you didn't complete the requirements set out before you. Instead, it is because Sensei has the ability to see your potential, and that you have not quite gotten there yet.
Initially you may feel like ripping your box apart and throwing it in the trash. You may wonder why you even bothered working on it so hard only to be told it isn't good enough. You may look at the boxes around you and start comparing them to yours. You may even wonder if other teachers would better appreciate your box. But this will get you nowhere.
Trust in those who have walked this path before you, and most importantly, trust in yourself. Your journey in the martial arts is not about what you are, but instead it is about what you will become.
Photo by: Graeme Weatherston
Sensei Lee,
ReplyDeleteI wish I had your ability to express thoughts in writing! I really enjoyed reading your blog and I really appreciate your thoughts on this subject. You are on spot.
Sensei Randy
Sometimes, Sensei can see what you cannot.
ReplyDeleteAlso, No one ever knows the techniques as well as they think they do ;)
S Randy: Thanks! (blush)
ReplyDeleteMeg: You're right, Sensei still corrects me on Seisan Kata :-/
Meg,
ReplyDeleteSometimes??
Also, the depth of "knowing" the technique is limited only by the depth one chooses to dive. First there are 2 or 3 moves to the technique, then an entire circle of movement, then many circles, then degrees of the circle, then minutes of the degrees and so on, and on...
Your post has many interesting dimensions!! Art and creativity; Creativity vs perfection; Martial arts and teaching; Enthusiasm and individuality; Conformity vs freedom to express yourself; and last but not least, Yin and yang!! My father was an art teacher so I read this with great affection. He was a good boxer and would have appreciated your enthusiasm!
ReplyDelete